A critical look at Mohammed’s relations with his wives
Muslims are aware of Mohammed’s numerous marriages and of his Allah-given privileges to have more wives than the rest of them. They believe that all of those marriages were for good causes like improving relations with certain tribes or helping the women concerned. Muslims also believe that most of Mohammed’s wives were not virgins and too old to be sexually attractive. None of these claims is true; they are purely fabricated excuses not supported by the Quran, sira (Mohammed’s biography) or Islamic history. Until I prepared this article, I believed at least one of Mohammed’s wives was too old for him. I am afraid this claim by Muslims is another big lie; none of Mohammed’s wives was too old and many of them were described as the ‘most beautiful’ in their tribes.
To keep the article within reasonable size, I deliberately avoided discussing the important issue of pedophile and child marriage as related to Aysha, which is discussed elsewhere. Also, for the same reason I did not delve into Mohammed’s marriage to Zainab to which I dedicated an article a few years ago.
The issue of virginity comes frequently when Muslims discuss Mohammed’s marriages. Mohammed had an obsession with virginity and brought up this issue frequently in the Quran and hadith. What I find striking is that today’s Muslims, who should have learned otherwise from their own experience, they also believe that virginity is essential for a perfect sexual pleasure, just like Mohammed did.
An essential massage in Islam, which is emphasized in the Quran, is that Mohammed is a model that every Muslim should emulate. The irony is that most of his marriages lie outside Islamic sharia. What is the point of being a model to the others if they are not allowed to copy him? Mohammed’s marriages and his relations with his wives are largely outside sharia in what is called god given privileges that only apply to Mohammed! Learning about those marriages is obviously of no use to the rest of Muslims but they still occupy a substantial proportion of the Quran, hadith and sira.
How many wives?
There is no definite answer, a fact that says a lot about Mohammed’s history. To simplify the subject, this article is based on the information given by Ibn Katheer in his book Al Kamel, which is one of those reliable Islamic references that Muslims call “ummahat al kutub” (meaning mothers of the books). According to Ibn Katheer Mohammed had nine wives when he died but had far more in his life.
Mohammed’s first wife was a very rich woman who employed Mohammed to look after her business. At the time of marriage she was forty years old while Mohammed was twenty five. Mohammed had eight children from Khadija; the boys died early while the girls survived.
Mohammed did not marry any other woman in Khadija’s life. The conditioned Islamic minds use this piece of information to prove that Mohammed’s marriages had nothing to do with his lust for women but were for religious and political reasons. Their conditioned minds do not grasp the fact that Khadija was in charge of the household and Mohammed was employed by her, it was only natural that he could not even think of having another wife.
The Shia dispute the claim that Mohammed had eight children from Khadija and argue that apart from Fatima, all the children were from previous marriages. Indeed, it is difficult to accept that Mohammed had eight children from Khadija, who was in her forties, but not a single child from all those beautiful young wives he had later.
None of Mohammed’s wives had any children and none of them ever had a miscarriage or even became pregnant. Also there is nothing in the Islamic history that describes, or refers to, a “pregnant” Khadija. Muslims are not inquisitive about this thought provoking area of Mohammed’s biography and if you open the subject they would say “Allah did not want the prophet to have sons” which ends the debate before it starts.
Mohammed had a child, Ibrahim, from Maria who was not his wife, but a sex-slave given to him as a gift from Egypt. She was described as ‘white’ and beautiful and Mohammed was evidently attracted to her. Maria became pregnant soon after arriving to Medina. Mohammed assumed he was the father of the baby but his jubilation was spoiled by the rumors concerning a relationship between Maria and the guard who escorted her from Egypt. Without even investigating the matter, Mohammed ordered Ali to kill the guard. Ali happened to look at the guy as he climbed a tree and noticed he was castrated, so decided not to kill him.
It is not easy, even for a doctor, to tell if a person is castrated by looking at him while climbing a tree.
Besides, castration is not that straightforward procedure with guaranteed success. That guard was with Maria for many weeks, all the way from Egypt to Medina, and it is common sense to assume that he had sex with her, probably many times, on the way. Mohammed’s decision to kill the guard reflects his lack of confidence in his fertility and the much acclaimed sexual prowess. This lack of confidence was also evident when he brought the baby to Aysha, hoping that she may spot some resemblance between him and the baby. To Mohammed’s disappointment Aysha remarked that the baby did not look like him at all.
It is doubtful, to say the least, that Ibrahim was Mohammed’s son and considering the doubts surrounding Khadija’s children, it is likely that Mohammed had no biological children at all. This raises a question about Mohammed’s fertility and sexuality. Erectile dysfunction, with or without infertility, could not be ruled out. It would also explain why he released a verse to forbid Muslims from marrying his wives after his death; perhaps he wanted to keep his little secret between him and his wives. To the Arabs, even today, being impotent or infertile is damaging to a man’s image. Mohammed’s claim that he had the sexual potency of forty men (1) is just too ridiculous to believe and could have been used to mask something else.
Sawda is portrayed in modern books of Islamic history as an OLD woman, and is the one usually used to prove that “most” of Mohammed’s wives were old. Until I prepared this article, I had the impression that she was in her sixties, so it was a surprise to me to learn that she was only in her early thirties at the time of marriage. When Mohammed died at the age of 63 years, Sawda was only 46 years old. This finding is just another example of the Islamic deception.
After Sawda, Mohammed soon married his favorite wife, the nine years old Aysha, and became a leader in Medina. He probably regretted his marriage to Sawda and decided to divorce her on the basis she was ‘too old’ for him! On hearing that, Sawda was shocked and came to Mohammed in tears and begged him to keep her. They agreed on a deal that Mohammed keeps her on condition she gives up her nights to Aysha! To his sick mind, Mohammed considered thirty years too old for him but nine years was just right! We can only conclude that Mohammed enjoyed sex with the nine years old Aysha more than with his adult wife.
To silence any criticism, he released a verse of approval: Q. 4:128 (And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them…)
She was Abu Bakr’s daughter and was only six years when engaged to Mohammed. Wedding took place in Medina when she was nine years. When Mohammed died, Aysha was only a teenager of Eighteen years. Aysha was the only virgin of all Mohammed’s wives and she was very proud of it. Her virginity mattered to her and was considered by her as a reason why she was superior to the other wives. Obviously she learned from Mohammed, who too was obsessed with virginity, that virgins are the best (2), which explains why she narrated many hadiths that reflected her pride of her virginity. She claimed that Gabriel never visited Mohammed while in bed with any of the other wives because they were not pure, having slept with other men before Mohammed.
Muslims are proud that Islam is a religion of equality. In the Quran, Allah orders Muslims to treat their wives equally. If a man loves one of his wives more than the others, he should keep that love in his heart. Mohammed’s love to Aysha was no secret; every Muslim knew she was his favorite wife from the times of Medina to our time. How does that fit with Allah’s orders? How can Muslims abide by Allah’s rule to treat their wives equally and follow the example of Mohammed at the same time?
Aysha was the woman who narrated more hadiths than any other of mohammed’s wives. She was the source of those hadiths related to her sexual relation with Mohammed. Mohammed loved her more than the others but his death didn’t do her any justice as she had to spend her entire adult life in celibacy. Aysha had sex only as a child and once she reached adulthood she was widowed and prohibited, by a divine order, from ever getting married again.
Aysha had to live the rest of her life with the memories of being sexually abused as a child by an old man. Could that frustration explain some of her behavior like her fondness of those sexual hadiths?
She was Omar’s daughter. She died about fifty years after Mohammed, so she also must have been young at the time of marriage.
One day, Mohammed went to her house ( each of Mohammed’s wives had her own house and maids) while she was away visiting her parents. That day was Hafsa’s turn to sleep with Mohammed. Hafsa was probably waiting for that day for a long time, considering the number of wives and concubines in Mohammed’s collection. Mohammed found nobody in the house except her maid, the beautiful ‘white’ Maria. Rather than waiting for his wife, Mohammed decided to have sex with the maid. Hafsa came back to find her husband in bed with beautiful Maria and went mad. She cried: “on my day and in my bed”. To calm her down, Mohammed promised not to have sex with Maria again, but Maria was too beautiful for Mohammed to keep his promise. As usual, the Quran came to the rescue with a verse that blamed Mohammed for accepting to abstain from Maria in order to keep his wives happy (Q. 66:1). In other words, the verse was a divine order to Mohammed to resume sex with his white beautiful maid.
The conditioned Muslims’ minds consider the above verse as a proof that the Quran was from Allah, not Mohammed. Their logic is how could Mohammed write a verse blaming himself! Those conditioned minds can not grasp the fact that the verse served Mohammed’s interests very well.
5. Um Salma
A widow of one of Mohammed’s followers. Apparently she was so attractive that leading Muslims like Abu Bakr and Omar proposed to her but she turned down all offers of marriage “because she would not find a man who was as good as her previous husband”. On hearing that, Mohammed decided to marry her because he was not only as good as her previous husband, but better! She must have been a young woman when she married Mohammed because she lived about fifty years after his death.
It looks like Mohammed was jealous of this woman’s love to her husband. In realistic terms, this woman was forced to love Mohammed and marry him and forced to admit that he was a better man than her deceased husband.
Mohammed made it an essential requirement of the Islamic faith that Muslims must love him more than they love their children, parents or themselves and the entire mankind put together. Without this degree of love, a Muslims’s faith would be fake. Those verses(3) and hadiths (4)(5) that emphasize this mandatory love are the ones usually quoted by Imams in mosques to charge the Muslims masses to go to the streets to defend Mohammed against “offending” free speech.
Never in the history of mankind a leader succeeded to force his love on every one of his subjects except Mohammed. Thanks to the religion of submission, Mohammed did it and got away with it for fourteen hundred years!!
6. Zainab Bint Jahsh
She was Mohammed’s daughter in law, before he abolished adoption.
7. Juwayryia Bint Al Harith
The wife of the leader of the Jewish tribe Bani Al Mutalaq. Her husband was killed in the battle and Mohammed married her a few days later. Her story is a reminder of Safyia’s story (see below)
8. Safiya Bint Huyai
If everything else in Islam is good and Mohammed was otherwise perfect, the story of Mohammed’s marriage to this woman, on its own, is more than enough to make anyone leave Islam and conclude that Mohammed was a dangerous and psychopathic gang leader.
Mohammed invaded Khayber, the living place of the Jewish tribe of Bani Nadeer, at dawn and set fire to the tents and palm trees. Burning palm trees was considered evil practice and was generally unacceptable in Arabia, but Allah revealed a verse explaining to the Arabs that what Mohammed did was OK. The tribe was defeated quickly and badly. Most men were massacred and the leader of the tribe, Kenana, was arrested, tortured and killed as per Mohammed’s orders. When the battle was over, one of the Muslims asked Mohammed to allow him to take a woman, safyia, as a slave for himself, to which Mohammed agreed. Other Muslims became jealous and told Mohammed that the woman was actually the wife of Kenana and was very beautiful. Mohammed ordered his men to bring the woman to him and once he looked at her, he immediately covered her with his garment, indicating that he decided to have her. Later that day, Mohammed freed her and married her.
Safyia, together with another woman, were lead to Mohammed by Bilal. On the way, the the scene of the massacre was too much for the other woman to control herself and she cried loudly. Mohammed ordered his men to ‘take that evil woman away’. When Mohammed saw the beauty of Safyia he suddenly became civilized and looked at Bilal and said: “What Bilal, is there no mercy in your heart?” blaming him for letting the women see the corpses! Without repentance or sense of shame, the Muslim scholars described the captured woman, who cried at the sight of the corpses, as evil but added PBUH after Mohammed’s name!
Safyia realized her fate as she lost her tribe and all power. When Mohammed offered her marriage she had to accept as the other option was slavery. Widows are required to wait over four months before getting married again, but Mohammed, the man with privileges, didn’t have to abide by his own rules and ordered the marriage that same night. Safyia was too traumatized to sleep with Mohammed that night, having lost her husband, brother and all the men of her tribe. The wedding was postponed for a few days to allow her time to recover from her shock.
After such a blood bath no human, or animal, would enjoy or even consider having sex, let alone with a woman who just witnessed the massacre of her entire family. Only severely deranged psychopaths do that and only dumb blind followers with dead conscience justify it.
It wasn’t only Mohammed who was cruel to Safyia because modern Muslims are just as bad. They do not dispute any of the above details, but they claim they were evidence of Mohammed’s kindness because he elevated Safyia’s status from slave to wife!! They also claim that Mohammed’s marriage to his Jewish wives was a good gesture that was supposed improve his relations with the Jews!
After virtually annihilating the tribes during the day, Mohammed and his followers had sex with the traumatized Jewish widows to improve relations with Jews!
Only a Muslim minds can reach that level of “reasoning”.
9. Zainab Bint Khuzyma
10. Um Habiba
She was the widow of one of Mohammed’s followers who emigrated to Ethiopia and then converted to christianity. She died during the Umayyad’s dynasty, so she must have been a young girl at the time of marriage.
12. A woman from Bani Kilab
This woman was advised by Mohammed’s other wives to say “I seek refuge with Allah from you” as he starts the foreplay. Mohammed divorced her immediately.
14. Asmaa Bin Numan
Mohammed discovered that she had white spots on her body, which he didn’t like. He divorced her immediately.
How kind and how civilized!
15. Bint Zabian
Mohammed became ill and died without a chance to sleep with her. She apostatized after his death!
17. Fatima Bint Sara’
18. Khawla Bint Huzayl
19. Layla Bint Khateem
There is obvious lack of details about some of Mohammed’s wives. There are no records about some of them except for their names, while others’ names have been completely missing. It is fair to assume that some wives were dropped completely from the memory of history.
To be fair to the Muslim historians, the subject was not that simple. Mohammed had wives that he kept, wives that he divorced, women to whom he was engaged but never married, women that he married but never had the chance to have sex with. He also had women who offered themselves to him free of charge. These offers were a god given rights to Mohammed, but not other Muslims. In addition to this Mohammed had maids and sex slaves, like Maria, who often counted as a wife by many Muslims but she was not.
With such a complexity, probably Mohammed himself would have trouble in telling which of those women would be included under wives, right hand possessions or offered to him and what would be the grand total of his true wives.
(1) Al Jami Al Kabeer by Sayuti 272
gabriel brought me a bowl, I ate from it and was given the sexual potency of 40 men
(3) Bukhari Volume 001, Book 002, Hadith Number 014.
Narated By Anas : The Prophet said “None of you will have faith till he loves me more than his father, his children and all mankind.”
(4) Bukhari Volume 008, Book 078, Hadith Number 628.1
“No, by Him in Whose Hand my soul is, (you will not have complete faith) till I am dearer to you than your own self.”
(5) Al Maugni by Al makdisi 468/7
“I recommend for you the virgins”